Days 60- 64 -- I Feel Like I Grew a Baby...

On Saturday, I traveled with two of my work girlfriends to Mohegan Sun in CT to see the oh-so-obnoxious and yet gut-wrenchingly funny Chelsea Handler.  We made a reservation to spend the night at a nearby Hilton, ensuring we could have our fun without worrying about driving home in the middle of the night.

Well, our plans were thrown off from the minute we left work.  We hit traffic, and the pouring rain didn't help much, either.  Our 55 minute drive actually took about an hour and a half.  And after checking into the hotel, we still had to circle back to the casino, find parking, and get to the arena for the 8:00 showtime.  We hit traffic again while trying to park at the casino, and that screwed with our dinner plans.  We intended to eat before the show, since our last meal was at 12:00.  But no luck for us.  We just barely made the show, so dinner had to wait until after Chelsea. 

So at 10:30, we embarked on our journey to find a dinner spot.  I don't know if any of you have ever been to  Mohegan on a Friday night, but regardless of what time you go, the restaurants are always packed.  We decided that southern comfort food was going to be our poison of choice.  I should have known it was going to be bad the minute I saw those red neon lights highlighting the words Big Bubba's BBQ. 

Being 10:30, we were famished.  My stomach had gone beyond the growling/churning/talk-until-you-feed-it phase and had entered the eat-your-own-insides-I'm-so-hungry period.  Going almost 11 hours without a meal was a REALLY bad idea.  So, naturally, I overate.  We started with strawberry daiquiris, proceeded to order barbeque nachos, and topped it all off with a plate of pulled pork, garnished with the heart-attack-inducing sides of french fries and cornbread.  It was delicious, but I totally overdid it.  My stomach muscles felt tight.  I mean, to the point where I literally felt like a beach ball that had been blown up too much and needed to have a little air released.

But that didn't stop the binge.  As if on auto-pilot, I walked to Ben & Jerry's and managed to sluggishly make my way to the counter.  A kiddie scoop?  Hell no!  One scoop?  Definitely not.  No, clearly I needed the two-scoop Strawberry Cheesecake in a jimmie-covered waffle cone.  I got no further than ten licks before I felt as if I were going to implode.  For the first time in my life, I thew away ice cream.  Literally, the first time.  I don't think that's ever happened before.  You know how some people say spilling alcohol is a waste of precious booze???  Yea, well throwing out ice cream is a waste of precious comfort-food. 

We made it back to the room around 2 a.m.  I felt sick.  I literally sat in the bathroom, considering whether or not I should make myself throw up, just to release some of the pressure I was feeling.  I decided against it, thinking that if I just went to bed, I'd feel better in the morning.

That night, I couldn't even sleep on my stomach, it hurt so much.  And when the morning came, I didn't feel much differently.  I felt like I had grown a baby overnight and that I was due in two months.  My skin felt stretched, my stomach tight.  I felt bloated.  I felt sick.  I felt like someone had poured three gallons of salt into me.  It was the most disgusting thing I had ever experienced. 

I know there were a number of things I did wrong this past weekend.  I ate too much.  I ate too late.  I didn't stick to my eating schedule, by having a healthy snack in the afternoon and eating a slim and trim meal in the early evening.  But what really shocked me this weekend was just how much my body had changed.  No joke -- I used to be able to finish the same amount of food without even flinching.  And it wouldn't have even hurt. 

But my meals this weekend proved to me how much my body, and my lifestyle, has changed in the past few months.  I can't eat the way I used to -- literally.  It's not only that I don't want to eat that way, but I literally can't.  My stomach has shrunk and if I continue to eat the way I did this weekend, I have no doubt I'll experience pretty much the same symptoms again. 

So... yay for my stomach being much smaller!  Boo to the binge-fest I had on Friday.  I wish I had better reasons to explain my behavior on Saturday, but as I told my husband, I didn't consciously think about my decisions once on Friday.  The Old Nicole found her way to the surface for a day or so, and it sucked.  I let my guard down, overate, chose the wrong foods, and just gave in to temptation way too much. 

In the past, weekends like this last one would have deterred me from getting "back on the wagon," so to speak.  Weekends like this last one would have convinced me that "I just love food too much" or "It's too hard."  And my desire to take the easy road out would have won.  But not this time.  Nope.  On Sunday, I was right back to making healthy decisions, and my normal habits.

Granted, the damage was already done.  I weighed in on Sunday morning at 249.4.  Major yuck.  And I know that going forward, I need to realize that one night of eating the way I want to isn't worth the damage it causes on the scale.  Hopefully I've learned that lesson now. 

Well, only time will tell.  Until then, I'll be running my giggly bum off at the gym and packing lunches of soup and fruit.  Maybe I'll incorporate some weights into my workouts this week.  Any suggestions for exercises???  Someone feeling satanic and want to make me feel that burn??? :-)  Let me know what makes you really sweat!

Nicole's Daily Menu
Breakfast
Multigrain Cheerios with 1% milk
Babybel Light Cheese Round
Snack
Kashi TLC Oats/Honey Granola Bars
Lunch
Veggie and Noodle Soup
2 Rice cakes with Babybel French Onion Spreadable Cheese
Chobani Strawberry Banana
Snack
Banana
Dinner
Enchilada with ground turkey, green peppers, and onions
Dessert
Niente :-) 

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