Day 4 -- Thank God for Small Victories... It's What Keeps You Going

OK, so yesterday I said that the post was going to be short.  Immediately after, I proceeded to write for 45 minutes.  I'm sure you're all getting a little tired of the extra-long posts, and to be quite honest, I'm pretty wiped out today. 

SO -- quick, short, brief post for tonight about my small victory today. 

Recently, I've been trying to become more aware about my eating patterns/habits, and as a result, had a small revelation.  The past month for me was a rough one -- I went out to lunch, or ordered it in, every day for two weeks straight!  Now, according to Kali (my super-duper, awesome nutritionist and thunderous, albeit sometimes ignored, voice of reason), I should be eating out no more than two times a week.  TOTAL.  That includes pizza on Friday night if Ted and I are too tired to cook or lunch with the girls on Saturday afternoon before shopping at the mall.  TWO TIMES.  Yea, well, needless to say my once a day rate needs to end (and has, thankfully). 

What I couldn't figure out is why I was suddenly abandoning all my improved eating habits for greasy, fattening, stomach-churning food.  I think I've finally figured it out, though.  My job is, at times, a little stressful.  I work as a legal assistant in a VERY busy foreclosure department at a medium-sized firm.  And when I feel like I'm going to rip my hair out, I find the quickest escape.  For me, for the past few weeks, that's been going to lunch.  Now, looking back, I know that I wasn't necessarily craving junk food.  I just needed to get away from work long enough to regain sanity! 

With that little tidbit of information in hand now, I'm more empowered and I've come up with a different strategy -- one that might work for you, too (if you struggle with this).  And thanks to my co-worker and Work Best Friend, Rachel, for agreeing to go at it with me!  From now on, I'm allowed to eat out twice a week, per Kali's original and previously ignored suggestions.  If I find that I'm stressed and need some breathing room, I (and whoever feels like going for the car ride with me) will leave for lunch and go to Target, Borders, Wal-Mart... basically anywhere that gets my mind off of work and away from food that will tempt me to make bad decisions.  Then, when I get back to the office, I'll eat whatever lunch I've packed for the day at my desk.  On the off chance I didn't have time to pack my lunch (which actually is more of the norm in the Ekholm House), then I'll go home for that hour and make a nutritious lunch with food I trust.  And Rachel has pledged to do the same.  I tell ya, having a buddy who agrees not only to hold you accountable, but subjects herself to the same sort of torture sure makes adhering to these changes that much easier!  So, THANK YOU RACHEL!!!!

Now, onto my next subject. I met with Kali this evening for the first time in five weeks.  And while I could tell she was disappointed I had gained 2.5 pounds in the past 2 months (eek!), I also know she was happy to see that I have re-focused.  She thinks the blog is a great idea and is happy to hear it's motivating me. 

Which leads me to my small victory of the day:  I STARED DOWN PEEPS!!!  And yes, I realize that statement probably makes no sense at all to you.  So let me explain. 

I adore the marshmallowy goodness that are Peeps.  I love Pumpkin Peeps, I love Snowmen Peeps, and I love Bunny Peeps.  I LOVE Peeps.  In my previous lifetime (and by that I mean this past Christmas), I've been known to down an entire package (that's 12, people) of Peeps that were given to me in my Christmas stocking... by NOON on Christmas Day.  Yes, I know.  Absolutely disgusting, right?  Whatever... it was my binge food.  I've accepted it.  Now, moving on.

So trust me when I say it was truly NO small victory when I found myself roaming through the aisles of Rite Aid today, in search of deodarant and mascara, only to stumble across an entire aisle of Devil-inspired foods(including Peeps!) and still manage to leave with only those two objects in my hand.  What made it worse was that I was on the phone with a friend, so I was lingering.  You would have thought I was a mother saying goodbye to her infant child, the way I was looking at those cute, squishy, hot pink-colored Bird Peeps.  I wanted them so bad.  As if it was all playing out in slow-motion, I reached for them, and then quickly pulled my hand back, afraid if I actually made contact with the package I'd be done for. 

I'm happy to say, no to boast, that I turned down those Peeps, and every other chocolate piece of decadence that lined both sides of that aisle.  I made it through the Gauntlet of Tempting Treats!  Go me!!!

But I'll be honest, the one thing that convinced me it wasn't worth it in yet another moment of weakness (I tried to tell you I stray often!)?  It was you guys.  The comments you have left, the messages you have sent me have really inspired me. It's so great to hear that you're all working through your own issues, making your own adjustments, and fighting the good fight.  And because of your inspiring words, your encouragement, I was able to make a good, healthy choice.  So thanks to you guys!

On a sidenote:  I've decided to start posting what I'll call "Nicole's Daily Menu."  This way, there's no hiding what I'm eating, and I'll be a hell of a lot less likely to make a poor choice when I know that I have to share it with all of you.  If I ever post something that looks of interest to you, feel free to comment and ask me for the recipe, or, if you'd like to know where to find a particular food.  I'm here for you guys! 

Stay strong tomorrow!  And keep making healthy choices!

Oh... and once again, I lied.  Yet ANOTHER long post.  :-\  Sorry!

Nicole's Daily Menu
Breakfast 
1/2 cup of Multigrain Cheerios with 1% milk, almonds
Morning Snack
Low fat Cheese Stick
Lunch
Roast beef on 100% whole wheat bread with Olive Oil-based mayo
Thin Crisp Triscuits with Laughing Cow French Onion Cheese spread
Strawberry Yogurt
Afternoon Snack
Sliced strawberries with Equal
Dinner
Enchiladas (yum!)
Steamed green beans
Dessert
1/2 cup Ben & Jerry's Mint Chocolate Cookie Ice Cream (It's a weakness!  What can I say???)